Saturday, April 30, 2011

Run from the heart.

I've just finished watching The Spirit Of The Marathon. I can't describe how I felt. It was like every single runner was carrying a piece of me with them. I cried the whole half ending of the movie. The tears would just come out one after the other, I couldn't help it. Just seeing those runners training so hard, giving their very best and crossing that line is just SO touching, so motivating, so inspiring... I can't get enough. Running is growing on me more than anything has ever had. I've never wanted anything more in my life than to run. I want to run more than I want to be a doctor. That's how strong it is. I can't help it. My days of a casual runner are behind me now. I run. I train. I see improvements. I see my body doing things I've never even considered possible. I would see how fast people were running at parks and only assume that kind of thing wasn't for me. That there was no way I could ever do that. Don't get me wrong, I still have a LONG way down the road. But I've crossed the starting line - and that means everything. Maybe I'll have to take a little walk in between. Maybe I'll get unmotivated. Maybe the finish line would be so far ahead that I will think I can't make it. I'll do my best to be strong. To not see so far ahead. To just keep going, one front in front of the other. That's all that matters right now to me. Running is teaching me to be patient. To trust the hard work and effort I've been putting into my training. It is making me believe in myself. It is allowing me to be powerful in all other aspects of my life - family, friends, school. Suddenly, you just want to try harder. Try harder to be a better daughter, a better friend, a better student, a better runner. Because I'm learning that persistence pays off. With everything. :)

I'm pretty sure my training is even interfering with my approach with the bitch anatomy... By the time I graduate, can you imagine how much improvement I will have accomplished? (we're talking around 6 years more down the road...). I'm gonna be a sports medicine doctor (you didn't know that, right? It's not like I've talked about it 394839 times here). And I'm gonna be a little bit of every athlete who enters my office. I'm gonna be able to share their feelings, their worries, because I have been there, I know how it feels, I know exactly what they've been through. Running is a crucial part of my career. Just remember that nothing you do is a waste. Everything has a purpose, everything can be used to make you wiser, stronger, or as a motivation for others. By this time last year, I was totally into a guy who didn't give a shit about me, I wasn't consistent with my workout, I was struggling with eating disorders, I was partying heavy, didn't give a shit about school, you name it. Now, one year after, I'm single, in total peace with my emotional feelings, studying my ass off to become a better doctor, to be able to help every single athlete out there, I'm a runner, I don't count calories, I don't try to purge if I eat too much, I don't binge on foods because I restrict them too much. Everything in moderation. When I compare what I was with what I'm becoming, I can't help it but smile and give myself a big hug. I'm improving, I'm learning, I'm becoming a person I've always wanted to be. And that is priceless. 

Sorry, no sarcasm today. I'm too mushy. I haven't had my period for almost 3 months, be jealous blame it on that. 

Have you ever struggled with anything eating-related?
Last year I was struggling with anorexia, then binge eating. Worst time of my life. 

What is your biggest goal right now?
To run the Buenos Aires marathon by the end of the year. Is that even a possibility?


  1. You're right - it is priceless! Sounds like a hell of a journey and it's good to know you're loving every bit of it!!

    Yes, you must try to see the west coast at one time or another. SF was beautiful but I still prefer LA :-)

  2. Você chorar nem me surpreende, a pessoa chora assistindo DE VOLTA PRA MINHA TERRA. KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

  3. @Laura: Thank youuu! I'm SO loving it, I can't imagine my live without it anymore! <33

    Damn, I really need to go back to the US sometimes... I really feel like trying to do a short trip around there again, but then I start think how big the world is and how many countries are out there that I still don't know... so it's kind of a waste to go visit a country where I've lived at I guess lol.



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