It's Sunday night. It's raining. I mean, not pouring raining, just a little tiny rain. And, yet, nobody wants to go out. It's really frustrating. I remember those times where no test, no rain, no sickness would be an excuse to NOT go out. Are people getting older? And, if that's the case, what the hell am I getting? Younger? More immature? Doesn't make sense to me.
Well, that wasn't the reason I wanted to write here about. The fact is that I've got myself reading something and crying more than I could even take. On the top of that, what I was reading wasn't even mine. It wasn't even for me. It was from a friend of mine to another one she got into a fight with. It's like... a love letter. Really. I need to quote at least this one part:
"I like you so much that you're the only one that can make me cry out of happiness. I can't live without you and now I feel so much pain for thinking that I could be without you that I can't stop crying. You are the only person that makes me cry that it's not for being angry.
I need you so much, so much that do the things I like the most don't bring me as much happiness as to get a "good morning" from you. I like you so much that no poem can translate this feeling, no song, no picture.
This feeling is so strong that I can't transpose it to words; I don't even understand it quite right, I just know that I like you unconditionally."
I mean, REALLY? And this was like 1/20th of the email. It was a totally declaration of pure friendship. And I think the reason I cried so much it was probably out of jealousy. I don't remember of ever getting a email like this from a friend. But I remember quite well have exactly the same feeling that she's describing there. And I still have this feeling for quite a few friends. And I couldn't help but doing the stupid grass comparison thing. But... when you don't even have a garden, does it really matter if the grass is greener on the other side? :S After that, I so need to read Nana again. Best manga ever.
Music: B.W.O - Sunshine In The Rain
"Tell me, Nana,
If for example we had been a love couple,
Would a hug have been enough to wash away my sadness?
Or then; does every single being carry this loneliness, like a burden?
I didn't want to make you all mine.
I just wanted you to need me, Nana." [Nana ]